In an early morning raid, two caucasion males dressed as Japanese ninjas found their way into the Crowell offices. Police are still unclear as to the reason for the break-in, but security camera footage suggests they may have plundered the liquor cabinet for Butterscotch Schnapps. Neither Kim Raap, self-proclaimed Butterscotch Schnapps aficionado, nor the Anti-Japanese Ninja Defamation League (AJNDL) are taking the matter lightly, and are pressing authorities to investigate further. In an unrelated story later that day, Amber Banks’ 5-year-old son Jordan and Dan The Intern showed up blind stinking drunk.